Of course, many people will jump to conclusions as to why older men dating younger women is on the rise, going straight to the clichés about predatory “dirty old men,” and dudes who cannot hack it in a relationship with a woman who is his equal. But if you actually take the time to ask men what motivates them, they will explain that the reasons are the same as anyone else: they want companionship, romance and passion—all things they too frequently do not find in women their own age, particularly men in their late forties and early fifties.
Frequently older men explain that when they meet women their own age either in person or through dating site, women in their fifties and older will claim that they “love to travel, walk on the beach, and dance the night away.” But once they turn up in person, they are not interested in any of these things. They are not interested in much of anything (Blake). The dirty old man claim starts to fall apart when you examine what older men have to contend with. It is no wonder that these men turn to younger women who are actually interested in doing exciting things. The men who seek younger women and actually find themselves in relationships with these women are vibrant and healthy men. They are men who still have massive life in them and still need to pursue the best that life has to offer and this includes love and passion.
It is no mystery that older men find younger women attractive, but this alone is just a facile and dismissive way to entirely account for the phenomenon of older men younger women relationships. Studies have shown that most men, older or younger, are attracted to women their own age and will pursue relationships with these women (Norton). It is not the young body alone that is creating the increasingly common occurrence of younger women involved with older me. What has sent older men toward younger women is the fact younger women are more vibrant and alive than their older counterparts. As older men enter the dating scenes, what they are after are women who want to go out for fun and interesting dinners, try new things, travel for the sake of adventure, etc. And as the study cited above has shown, neither men nor women look for many characteristics in a dating partner and base little of their decisions on age alone. When looking to meet a woman, older men are looking for fun and exciting women and it seems they do not generally find fun or exciting in older women. If we want to be overly simplistic about it all, this would seem to be the bottom line: older men younger women relationships are more satisfying.
While we cannot discount the older man who is primarily focused on younger women because they are just young and “hot,” the truth about these kinds of men is that they did not get older and start obsessing about only the most shallow aspects of women, men like this typically have always been shallow. Most older men and research has shown this who date younger women and enter into relationships with younger women are interested in the most honest and basic features of dating. They want women who are interested in doing exciting things in life. They are looking for women who want to embrace life and living. Older men just seem to find these attributes in younger women far more than they do in older women.
Blake, Tom. “On Life and Love After 50: Older Men Dating Younger Women a Controversial Topic.” Dana Point Times.
Norton, Amy. “Do Older Men Prefer Younger Women? New Study Challenges Stereotypes.” CBS News.